We all fear it. You get your group together to play Dungeons & Dragons or Pathfinder or Shadowdark. And then it happens: Things are just not clicking!!!
It doesn’t matter how much you prepped. Or maybe it was impossible to prep enough due to all the moving pieces involved. Or you just couldn’t improv that day. Or all of the above.
You’re constantly pausing to look things up in your notes for the 40th location (of 60) that you just couldn’t get familiar enough with. You apologize for the constant pauses and the players tell you, “No. That’s all right.” The PCs avoided the only definite combat encounter that would have eaten up a lot of time, so you’re just doing your best to hold on until the end of the session.
Ugh. Well, bad sessions happen. We can do everything in our power to prevent them but you’ve got to prepare yourself mentally for the fact that you will definitely run some bad sessions. (Hopefully, not a bunch in a row! That would truly suck.) Some sessions you and the players are in the groove. Some sessions nothing is working. Most sessions are somewhere in-between, but mostly pretty good to great.
What to do: Accept It
So, what should you do if you know you’re about to have, are having, or just had a bad session?
First, notice that that was really three questions. The thing to do that’s appropriate to all three states is accept the fact. Acceptance allows you to calm down, at least a little, and just deal with the situation.
Knowing Ahead of Time
In the case of knowing ahead of time that a session will definitely be bad–I’m not talking about a self-fulfilling prophecy here–acceptance means you can still provide your players with a game session. Sometimes, that’s all they want. Sometimes they just want to have an excuse to hang out that week. Acceptance also allows you to calm down about prepping. Over-prepping or allowing yourself to stress out about preparation is often as bad or worse than not prepping enough. Now, that’s a heretical thing to say. I believe you should ALWAYS prep. But when you aren’t getting into the groove with your preparations, don’t do more than you have to. It’ll help your brain be more ready to improvise in the moment and hopefully enjoy the session more.
Remember, sometimes being a good DM isn’t about having every session be good. It’s more important to show up for the game.
Knowing When It’s Happening
In the case of using acceptance during a session, you’ll find it helps you remain in the flow as best as you can AT THAT TIME. It probably won’t get you into a flow state. But it’ll get you closer to one. Stressing about the issue is a form of fighting it and that fighting against what’s happening in the now will only make things worse. You’re probably already losing focus on your notes and forgetting rules and whatnot. If you’re focused on that fact, you’re losing even more focus on your notes and rules! Take a few deep breaths and just keep swimming, just keep swimming. (To quote Dory in Finding Nemo.)
And, remember, it’s all right to be having a bad session.
And Then When It Ends
“Just keep swimming” also applies to what acceptance does for you after a bad session. If you’re focused on how bad things went, how you’re a horrible dungeon master, that you think you might lose players, and predicting that the next session will probably be as bad–now, that is potentially a self-fulfilling prophecy that needs nipping at the bud–then you’re going to have trouble planning a prepping the next session. How can you improve upon the session we just had if we can’t get ourselves to move forward and do the work.
Accept that you just had a bad session and that that’s all right. Just keep swimming.
Just so you know, often a DM believes a session went poorly but the players thought it went great. That’s another thing to remember.
One thing I like to do at the end of some sessions is to ask the players what their plans are for the next session. What will their characters probably do? This way I can prep to those possibilities and reduce the likelihood of a bad session (assuming you don’t get married to what you’ve prepared). When I have a bad session, I often realize I forgot to do this. But sometimes their plans are vague or very open-end and you just can’t prep towards that. Even when you can, sometimes whether or not you have a good or bad session depends on your ability to go with the flow and improv that day. Or any number of other things you can’t control.
This just happened to me. I was overwhelmed with prep and my ability to improve went totally out the window. But I was told the players still enjoyed themselves, and so, while still technically a “bad” session, it was still a successful session.
Just keep gaming. Just keep gaming.
What things have you had to overcome for bad sessions? What strategies do you use when they happen? Put them in the comments below!